Written By: Dani
Connect with Dani: IG: @CoachingwithDani_
Age Written: 33. Age Writing to: 27. Location: San Diego, CA, U.S.A.
To Her,
You’re standing in the shower, and the inner monologue on repeat is saying, It shouldn’t be this hard. And you’re right, it shouldn’t. But no matter what you do or what you try, you can’t seem to shake this feeling.
Well, my dear, this feeling is your inner knowing. It’s your gut, your guide, and it’s not wrong. No matter how much you try to ignore it or shake it off, it persists. And that’s a blessing. It’s your guide.
I wish I could tell you that you could skip the pain by simply knowing it’s better on the other side. That you could somehow know just how good it’s going to get. But that’s life. You have to trust your gut and experience it for yourself. All of it.
I know this pain. The not knowing, the guessing, the wishing things were different. The anxiety, the guilt, all the emotions. But without them, you might stay. You might miss the best part of your life. These feelings are what make you human, what make you special. This is your gift.
But sweet girl, I wish I could tell you how proud of you I am.
You will take the leap. You will finally give in to that feeling. You will have that moment when you say, Enough is enough. I don’t want to feel this way anymore. And you will finally trust that your gut wouldn’t steer you wrong.
This relationship, this moment, is all part of your story. The pain you’re feeling now will later show you that when something is right, you won’t feel this way. But without what you’re learning today, you wouldn’t know what to compare it to.
I’m so proud of you for entering this relationship with your whole heart. For learning to love, for learning to understand your boundaries, and for trying and trying again to voice and honor them, no matter how difficult.
You deserve the kind of love that doesn’t want to change you. The kind that loves you in every moment, through the highs and the lows. The kind where you always feel safe, secure, heard, trusted, and never judged. Where you are held wholeheartedly.
You are enough. You never need to doubt your worth or wonder if this is right.
I know how hard it is when staying seems like the easier option. When you convince yourself there’s something you could do to make it fit, to make it feel right. You see everyone getting married, and I know you want that, too. But the right one will never pass you up. You will never be too late because you’re always exactly where you need to be. Getting still. Trusting yourself. Honoring that voice inside of you.
I know the fear of starting over. The fear that you’ll never meet someone else. The fear of hurting your partner. These feelings are real and valid, but they aren’t reasons to stay or to stop trusting your gut. They’re there to protect you, but the only way to walk alongside them is to show them that you’re stronger. That you can do this. That you trust yourself enough to know you’ll get through it.
And my dear, that builds confidence. It builds character. It builds the bridge to your next chapter.
So, as afraid as you are to take the leap, know that you will not fall. You will persevere. You will find parts of yourself you didn’t even know existed. You will unlock parts of yourself that propel you into the next chapter. The one where you get to make your own money. The one where you’re so damn confident in your career, your skills, your passion, and your ability to be loved.
The one where you look back on this chapter with nothing but gratitude for what it gave you and how it shaped the woman you are today.
You are beautiful. You are worthy. And this is a beautiful chapter of your story.
